Unexpected Morning Run


Today I took Kylie on her usual morning walk at 7am right after I woke up. There’s a little path we always take her in our gated apartment complex and she pees in the same spot and poops in two different spots. Today, after she pooped, Kylie stepped out of the vine bushes and I went in to pick up her poop. I felt a weird tug and clicking sound so I looked back and when I did, she was out of her harness and sitting about a yard away from me.

Internally I was panicking, but I wanted to remain calm and try to get her to come to me. I called her but of course our asshole of a dog didn’t come so I started walking towards her and then she sprinted away through the tennis courts and out towards the parking lot. I ran after her. The security guy saw Kylie, then saw me chasing her and said, “Is that your dog?” I yelled, “Yes!!” as I sped past him and heard him say, “Oh shit” as he ran along and tried to help me.

Eventually I got really tired. I’ve only been running for like three days now and I’m not in the best shape. So I started walking because I saw her walking behind a row of cars, and then she was gone. I ran back to my apartment and yelled for Robert to wake up and he ran out of the apartment with me in nothing but his basketball shorts (not even shoes).

20 minutes later all three of us had Kylie almost cornered in the parking lot near our apartment. The only reason we caught her was because we didn’t- I guess she got tired and sat in front of our apartment door, tail wagging and tongue hanging out, waiting for us to open it for her. We thanked the security guard and went into the apartment to give Kylie the longest spanking of her life.

I know some people don’t condone hitting your dog, but: 1. She’s a beast and nothing hurts her under her 10lbs of fur  2. She doesn’t listen  3. Don’t tell me how to train my dog.

So it was a stressful morning. My dog doesn’t listen to me and today I hate her for it. But at least I got a morning run out of it.

Unexpected Morning Run

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